Wednesday, September 14, 2005



Bad things happen to good people.

...and in many cases... we cannot even begin to comprehend why an all powerful God... like my God would allow such things to occur in the first place.

The problem of evil... in being the crux of the argument made against the simple presence or existence of God presents many doubts in the minds of many.

The problem with such an argument is in making the assumption that God would follow the human construct of logic and common sense. If such an imagined condition within a predetermined set of principles and guidelines were assumed to reign in all the universe... the simple existence of humanity itself and the world would be invalid. How can the human definition of meaning and worth be ascribed to such a empty argument of human existence stemming from the condensation and explosion of matter at one point in time. Ascribing faith... faith... in an unimaginable probability of certain forces coming together at the right place at the right time... to create a world... a society...a culture... families... mothers... fathers... sons... daughters. To encapsulate the human experience within such cold and imagined boundaries is simply... in my mind... bullshit.

We have been given what we have. The right to claiming the apocryhal nature of intelligent design is valid; however, subjegating this notion into the realm of falsity is not. Every scientific construct, principle, theory, hypothesis, or question must be taken with a grain of faith... no matter how small. Twenty years ago, our image of the cell membrane was vastly different from the picture we have drawn today. If we cannot even concretely understand the basic unit of our own bodies... how can we even begin to extend these accusations upon things that stem outside of our bodies. Even if we question the existence of reality outside of our own subjective experience... how can we so wholeheartedly deny even the possibility in someone greater than ourselves? Are we so "intellectually" bloated to the point of constantly denying the existence of something greater than ourselves? We believe that science can solve everything... and if given enough time, effort, and money... maybe it can. But if science is given the faith that it gets... without question... then the existence of this God... my God... deserves some faith too.

... so yes... shit happens

Is there always a reason? I honestly cannot tell you.

What do you tell an individual who is at risk of losing a loved one to a potentially terminal disease? Do you tell them that whatever happens... it was God's will all along?

What do you tell a couple who have just recently lost a baby? Do you tell them that the child has gone to happy-land and is frolicking in the right hand of God?

What do you tell the individual who has strived to evoke change in this world... to make this place better... only to be denied any opportunity... and be shunned from a society that neither appreciates his or her effort... or heart.

No one... and I mean no one... can truly answer these questions with the cold, presumed objectivity of a scientist or a psychologist for that matter.

Do we only feel hope because it's an evolutionary adaptation that induces greater fitness through increasing the will to live? Do we continue to live only because we hope and pray for a better day to come when... no such day will come?

Can you look into the eyes of any individual and truly tell them... with all your heart and soul... that... for at least this moment in time... and in this place... maybe... just maybe... we have to stop trusting what human logic and intelligence tells us... and to follow something that cannot be ascribed in such words as these... that to have hope... faith... and love... maybe the only way?




Monday, September 12, 2005



the leaves have yet to fall but the clouds are readily rolling in

to this island that i choose to spend this portion of my life on.

my perception and from what i expect to be the perceptions of most people

tell me that when the leaves start falling

hearts start breaking

in remembrance of what once was

or what could have been.

many people around me seem to be hurtin' in secret.

one can see such pain from the quick looks they give to couples

these looks filled with memories of pain or happiness

maybe even memories that hold absolutely no relevance

and simple reproductions of their imaginations of reality and society in general.

maybe these looks are filled with thoughts of great violence

huge skyscraper sized leaves falling onto these amour-filled couples as they walk

down with their once comfortable stomaches filled with oven heated pie slices

and extra hot-non fat-soy-no foam-green tea-matcha-strawberry avocado cream-mocha-

latte frappacino.

walking down a road that cannot be seen

completely covered with fallen leaves

the rain will begin to fall

the cold will embrace the wind

flakes can then have their turn

to turn this world in

to an unrecognizable place.

where imagination becomes

and reality begins.